The ‘Matrimonial’ Site Experience

funny

That’s how a typical Sunday begins for me. And maybe for a few other fellow Indian men/women on the wrong side of 20 who haven’t yet had the wondrous opportunity of getting hitched and don’t even have prospects at hand. Alas!(sarcasm suits me!)

Yes, the parents are losing their mind and their sleep over my marital status. So to cool it down a bit I agreed to be up on this matrimonial site which claims to be able to give you access to a number of potential suitable boys/girls and going a step further promises to find you a dream match leading to a happy marriage if you are ready to shell out a little money. Hello? The first bit I can digest but happy marriage are you promising? How?

Sigh! Being honest, I never thought I would have to be going through this. Imagine me sitting in front of the laptop with a stooped shoulder right now. But hey, this can be fun too. Not that I am not serious about it (I am yet to find a suitable boy) but these sites actually are entertaining when you come across some crazy hilarious profiles, some weird profiles (the one above sent me an interest) and some downright atrocious profiles. I remember a guy’s bio saying,”I want white gurls only, no black gurls plz. Semi-white still ok.” Gah!

Then you find a profile which seems good. You agree to talk and then you realise that there’s a reason why people ask you not to judge a book by its cover. Do NOT judge a boy by his matrimonial site profile. Never! The number of guys I have talked to, thanks to Daddy dearest giving away my personal number to whom he feels suitable, is quite a lot. And though there has been a mix of good and bad, it’s sad that the number of bad wins marginally. The first day (which was also the last day) I talked to this guy over Whatsapp for 15 minutes, he put up a mushy status on Whatsapp and actually had the incredible courage to actually text me late at night to let me know it was lucky me who it was for. Like, seriously! There also was this NRI from Australia who probably felt his bachelorhood was a gift to the womankind. Why? Because he was an NRI! When I did text him with all respect that it just didn’t click between the two of us. His extra long reply hilariously ended with ‘best wishes for your groom hunt and hope you find a good guy in the local area’. I was LMAO. Literally.

Moving on to when I decide to meet the guy. Haven’t met too many, no one gets through those initial stages you see! But. I will always remember this one guy I met at a coffee shop in Delhi. See. I don’t mind fat but then his pics and him…. umm atleast I knew he was good at photoshop, like really good. The conversation that followed was:

He: You cook?
Me: Not much. You?
*silence*
He: I can.
Me: Do you?
*silence*
He: Think I should be running along. Getting late.
Me: Yeah?
*Almost at the exit*
He: Ah! The check.
Me: I will take care of it.
He: You will?
Me: I will.
*runs to the parking*

No points for guessing, I never heard from him. I don’t even know what was it with the cooking! So we also came to know he (inspite of being quite big) could run pretty fast!

These episodes, though funny, make me ponder if I am even ready or if ever anyone’s ready. Thankfully, the arranged marriage scene is quite cool in our community and so the unmarried 20 something working woman who is a tad bit weird and a little dreamy with romance sprinkled all over still thrives. *fingers crossed*CU_skeJWIAAM5Es

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